Thank goodness for synthetics. I am of course a big fan of the natural world, but some man-made things deserve a special mention nonetheless; such as chocolate, chewing gum, dentistry (probably in that order), fleecy blankets and flip flops (again in that order), synthetic hormones, digital technology, and PU leather.
I have synthetic hormones to thank for a fairly good year so far, endo-wise at least. Following a difficult winter, my body seemed at last to acclimatise to the monthly regimen of Decapeptyl* injections plus HRT**, and I enjoyed several largely pain-free months – my four-weekly pat on the back in exchange for a stab in the butt, as it were.
Although they did not completely eliminate my health issues (fatigue is still a problem), the synthetic hormones did enable me to return to work on a part-time basis. Digital technology, and my fantastic employer, enabled me to work from home (I still do). My confidence slowly improved and, last month, I was successful at interview, securing a permanent contract (a huge weight off my mind, all things considered).
I am so lucky. Or so blessed? Or both? I’ll leave the exact wording and underlying philosophy to you. Nonetheless, the fatigue does still curb me somewhat; so, there is still room for improvement. First world problems.
Thanks to the spoilsports at the UK Medicines and Healthcare Regulatory Agency, testosterone therapy is not available to me unless I buy it privately online. Ah well, said the doctors – oestrogen can also improve fatigue; so, the dosage of oestrogen in my HRT was increased.
Almost instantly, my endo responded. Oestrogen is like Baby Bio to the weed that is endo – the nasty bugger has been absolutely loving the chemical boost it’s been getting. I’ve had pain in all the usual places, plus headaches, urinary symptoms and, ironically, fatigue. And today – ta dah!! – a new symptom: explosive diarrhoea.
Yes, dear reader, whilst professionally typing away at my work laptop this morning, I sharted. It came out of nowhere, and went absolutely everywhere. Hence why I am so grateful for PU leather: it wipes clean very easily.
After that delightful episode, I was exhausted and had to sleep for the afternoon. At some point though, a persistently piercing female voice disturbed my slumber. I groggily got out of bed and grumbled at my husband to turn down the TV. Back under the cosy blanket, I was again prevented from sleeping by the annoying voice. It turned out I had butt-dialled a Facebook video channel on my phone, in my sleep. For the second time today, my butt was responsible for a stream of unmitigated crap.
So, to my darling husband, I apologise. For once the shit was not coming from you.
* Decapeptyl is a necessary evil that ‘switches off’ the ovaries, so that oestrogen levels can be synthetically stabilised, thus stabilising endo symptoms. If you’re lucky. I wrote about it a wee while back, in https://ownendo.com/2021/08/11/d-day/
** HRT = Hormone Replacement Therapy. Because, as with many abusive relationships, can’t live with ‘em, and can’t live without ‘em either.
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